Moving Up

It had been two weeks since the day I met Carlotta Lobos. In my love-struck daze, I realized I had gone home that fateful night without her phone number or address. With no way to reach her, I felt lost, like my heart had  been stolen and I was left with little more than a shell of myself. I spent the following days searching for her instead of trying to make any money. In my eyes, she was worth more to me then any possession. I asked around town to see if any one knew of her, however I came up empty-handed. Those who knew her didn’t know where she had gone.

I eventually decided it was best to just move on and try to rebuild what little bit of my heart I had left. I got up one morning and went out to the river. I may not have been a good fisherman, but I enjoyed it and the placid water helped me feel at ease with the world. It was hard to come to terms with what I felt; if I couldn’t have my soul mate, Carlotta, then I was going to try to catch all of the fish in the river.

I cast my line out after, yet another, false alarm. I had been out there for hours already and the sky had begun its transition to darkness. Far out behind the hills I could see a hazy glow of reddish-orange sky, but all around me was a lonely black. The only light I fished by was the cool glow of a high moon. I wanted to stay out at the edge of the river and fish until I could no longer throw out my line. Until I no longer felt the pain in my heart; perhaps until it stopped it’s steady beat.

I reeled in my line. Nothing. I sat down and sighed. Despite my efforts, I could do nothing to get Carlotta out of my mind. I wanted to see her again, and I knew if I were ever given the chance again, I would not let her slip away so easily. I covered my face with my rough hands and ran my fingers through my long, wavy hair. I could hear the sounds of crickets calling out to their mates behind me. Occasionally there was the saddening song of a far away bird, but he never received a reply.

I grabbed my fishing pole and stood up, what was the point of staying out here any longer. I turned around to head home and there she was; standing behind me, with only the moonlight to brighten her smooth face. I smiled, my Carlotta had come back!

I dropped my pole and ran to her. I grabbed her and held her tight in my arms and kept repeating over and over that I missed her. She was silent, unmoving. I let go and stepped back so I could look into her eyes. I could sense happiness, but it was being shadowed by a heavy pain. She closed her eyes and looked away, but I put my hand up to her face and turned her gaze back on me. I gave her a soft kiss and asked her to tell me what was wrong.

“We can’t be together…”

My heart sunk, all the pain I felt when I didn’t know where she was disappeared and I felt my heart shatter. I didn’t know that words could ever cause such an intense pain. I looked at her with a puzzled gaze, hoping she would understand that I needed to hear more. She took a quivering breath, clearly trying to hold back the pain she felt; but she bravely continued.

“As you know, I have been gone these past two weeks. I should have told you, but I didn’t know what you would think of me if I did. Well, I’m insane. I went to a mental health hospital for evaluation and to try to find a way to get help. They said that I have Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder. They said they will need further evaluations before they can treat it, but because of the severity of my outbursts, they told me I would never be able to have a family. I have severe aggression and am easily agitated, so they fear how I would react if I were to ever have a child.”

Tears began to pool in her eyes and overflow onto her cheeks as her low lip began to tremble.

“I don’t wanna hurt anyone.”

She struggled to say that last sentence as she gulped through her tears. I pulled her cold body into my chest and she wrapped her arms around me. She buried her face into my shirt and I could hear her trying to muffle her sobs.

Despite any problems she may have had, I knew that I loved her and, now more than ever, I wanted her to have the wonderful life she deserved. I closed my eyes and breathed her in. As I exhaled I told her I wanted her to move in with me. I confessed my love for her; poured my heart out to her and said everything I felt about her. Her love was the only thing I needed in this life and I made sure she knew it. Once I became quiet, she turned her tear-stained face up to me and looked deep into my eyes. She must have realized my sincerity, because she smiled and held me tighter.

We spent the rest of the night laying under the stars in the light of the moon, enjoying the night that would begin the rest of our lives together.

I knew that Carlotta’s family was wealthy, and I was surprised how easy it was for her to turn down all she had just to be with me. Her parents were, surprisingly, very elated when they found out that Carlotta was going to move out. They gave her nearly twelve thousand dollars to help us get by and that was the last that either of us ever heard from them.

We used the money to expand the shack into a more house-like building. We added a small kitchen, bedroom, and bathroom. With the cost of everything, we ran out of funds for flooring or wall coverings. At least we had the basics. The best part was the double bed we were able to purchase. It was a real bed, not just a bag full of straw. Our house was by far less than perfect, but it was perfectly imperfect for us. We had our love, what else was there to wish for.

I had been searching for a job basically ever since I moved to Riverview, but each job I found I was rejected for one reason or another. Most commonly it was because of my lack of skill or previous job experience. Even though my skills were limited, they were improving. I was handy with tools and could fix or upgrade almost anything within a few hours time. I also had a garden and it was producing food for my meals and what I didn’t eat I sold to the locals for cheap. These were not skills that employers were looking for and I was still empty-handed a month after Carlotta had moved in. Money was tight, we both knew it, but we never spoke of it. I felt bad that she had left a life of luxury to be with me. If she was unhappy though, she was good at hiding it.

I was skimming through the job section of the free newspaper I received every day, not expecting to see anything new. Must be good at… skip… Must have… skip… Previous skills necessary… skip… Must know how to garden… I knew how to grow stuff; I was good at gardening. Apply at Riverview Science Lab. I nearly jumped out of my chair. Carlotta looked at me and I told her I may have found a job. I ran out of the house and over to the science center.

I don’t think they were too picky about who they hired, my interview was one question.

“Do you know how to garden?”

To which I replied, yes. They told me to be there the next day and threw a lab coat to me.

Chapter Three: A Little Hard Work